Saturday, March 27, 2010

Once again Volume Control

Wouldn't it be great if there was a setting on your remote to automatically turn the volume off when a program goes to commercials?
My remote has 60 buttons (Yes, I counted them). I have no idea what half of them do. If there was a button to turn off the volume when annoying LOUD commercials came on I would be sure to read the manual and figure out how to use it! People have said “Just record the program, wait 15 minutes and you can just fast forward through the commercials”. Yes, I get that and have done it many times, however there are times I actually like the breaks. It reminds me of going to the drive in when they had intermission. You get up, get a snack, go to the bathroom or even check your email. The 3X increase in volume not only annoys me but I always worry that it may be annoying my neighbors as well. "Let's all go to the lobby, Let's all go to the lobby, Let's all go to the lobby to get ourselves a treat"

Cancer SUCKS!

Two years ago I attended a pre-screening of the movie “Elegy”. Not only was the movie disappointing but horribly depressing regarding breast cancer. I had no idea what the movie was about and brought a very good friend of mine as a guest. She was in the last stages of fighting breast cancer herself and after the movie she turned to me and said something like “Thanks for that uplifting movie, I really enjoyed it”. Thankfully she is a very good friend and the comment was completely sarcastic – She is now cancer free (YEAH!) and we can get a good laugh out of the situation. Dennis Hopper was there to speak after the film, I didn’t get a chance to meet him but at one point I was standing about two feet from him and he looked damned good! I hope he has the strength to kick cancers ass and continue to be the bad ass he always has been. Dennis Hopper – What can I say – the man is a legend. Best wishes to him and all other fighting this shitty disease.

Thursday, March 25, 2010

National Healthcare

Just asking, why are so many people against national healthcare? I admit that I haven’t followed the issue as closely as some others. I have seen a lot of negative comments from people but not any specific reasons – please, no negative comments, I’m truly asking a legitimate question looking for answers. I have experienced national healthcare twice in other countries with great results. Please, once again I’m asking for legitimate concerns, not negative comments. We are one of the wealthiest countries in the world, why can’t we provide healthcare for all legitimate residents?

Monday, March 22, 2010

Toilet Paper

In your own home, sitting on the toilet in the middle of doing your business, you look up and realize there is no toilet paper.
#1 – What do you do? (Panic)
#2 - Who was the last one in here and why didn’t they replace the roll?
#3 - When you find out who it was, how can you get away with homicide and not get caught?
#4 – When you realize it was actually YOU who were in there last and didn’t replenish the roll what do you do?

My answer was to put a post-it note above the paper roll that reads “Replenish you Dumb Ass – so you won’t be stuck here again!”

Saturday, March 20, 2010

Customer Service

It has kind of bummed me out the past few years how quickly “customer service” has disappeared. ATM machines instead of bank tellers, automated self serve checkouts at the grocery store rather than actual human service and even the Redbox DVD kiosks you can find at many grocery and convenience stores (Though I do have to admit, I really like the Redbox kiosks).

What kills me is that with all of this “do it yourself” technology I have not seen the price of goods go down. When companies start using these automated machines it means they have to hire less employees which means less wages and benefits paid out. I have yet to see those savings get passed onto the consumer. They even guilt us into “Going Green” and spending our own money on reusable bags that we can purchase from them. I do believe in helping out the environment however, if these companies are no longer paying to purchase bags to provide for their customers, why don’t we see any savings?

I remember when I first started driving, there was no such thing as “Self Serve” at the gas station. You didn’t even have to get out of your car, someone came to your window, took your money, pumped your gas and sometimes even cleaned your windows. Sometimes there would even be a little banter (about what I can’t remember) but I think they actually still do this in New Jersey.

Imagine my surprise when I was at the gas station the other day and there were employees standing by the pumps. When I got out of my car one approached me and asked if I would like my windows cleaned for free as it was Customer Appreciation Day. While I was pumping gas and he was doing (a very nice job) on the windows we had some idle chat about the earthquake we had experienced recently. We also talked about Haiti and Chile, and how people could help them out with their recent devastation. We also chatted about other much more trivial things. I offered him a tip but they were not allowed to take any, so I drove away waving goodbye. It put me in a really good mood, Not because anything that we talked about make a profound difference in my life but it was nice to chat – even though I never got his name.

Are we actually de-socializing ourselves with all these automated services? I would have to say yes, because at the moment I am sharing my thoughts via the internet rather than another human presence. Is there an answer to all this? Who knows, maybe we all just to need stop using automated services (which I really doubt will happen, we all love the conveniences they provide) but maybe we should host more dinners, picnics or lunches so we can talk rather than blog. Or bring back the “Cocktail Parties” that were so popular in the 50’s and 60’s – Yep – that's the one I vote for!


Thursday, March 18, 2010

L.A.P.D.

While watching the news this morning it was interrupted with a “Breaking News” stolen car chase. This guy had like 10 cop cars chasing him, not to mention a helicopter! Of course, the cops got him (YEAH!). Why do these fools think they can actually get away – are there secret “criminal streets” that we don’t know about? A lot of people give the police a ton of shit. I myself have met some crappy ones but I have also met some really good ones. I am never happy to be “busted”, however, if I break the law and get caught I guess I deserve it. BTW, I have only been “busted” for speeding and making an illegal U turn – no homicide or bank robberies on my record. Just remember, when you’re in trouble, who do you call? Ghostbusters – no – it’s actually 911. Do you ever call the cops to say “Hey, were having a great dinner party over here, would you like to join the party?” Please give the good cops the props they deserve.

Wednesday, March 17, 2010

Liberace

A lot of people have been PM’ing me on FB asking about Liberace. One day I decided to do some major cleaning. I opened all my windows and my front door which optimizes a good fresh air flow. I don’t have a problem leaving my front door open because
1 My neighborhood is great and my neighbors are even better. Many times they have seen my front door open and came by to make sure everything was O.K. – LOVE you guys!
2 We don’t really have many bugs here. No flies, mosquitoes. Mostly just June bugs and spiders. June bugs I find are funny, they seem to be quite stupid and if they ever make it into my home I just catch them and let them out. Spiders are killed on the spot, no jury, no trial.
O.K. back to my original statement. One day I was cleaning up in the kitchen but couldn’t hear my Roomba (he was not named at that time). Turns out, he had jumped the front doorframe and was heading down the sidewalk! If I hadn’t have caught him he could have been hit by a car. That’s when I decided to bedazzle him, name him Liberace and make him my personal slave. So for anyone thinking about getting a Roomba – I say yes, they rock, just don’t leave your front door open.

My day just got better!

A friend came over to visit and she brought her jack russell terrier named “Jack”. When they arrived I had my Roomba (who I have named Liberace, he is now covered with rhinestones and will never try to escape again because if Dlisted ever got a photo of him he would be very embarrassed). Anyway, Jack came in, saw Liberace and had this “WTF” look on his face. Jack finally decided to check it out and followed it around for a while. He decided to get brave and hit it with his paw, well Liberace, as programmed, just turned and went in a different direction. This went on for about 15 minutes then Jack just sat down and gave me a look that said “Are you Fucking with me?”. I felt so sorry for him that I gave him my leftover chicken from dinner last night and turned off Mr. Liberace. Jack was a much happier camper after that.

More pissy stuff - p.s. the rest of my day has been just fine

I was just on hold with Verizon Wireless because I just got a letter from the California State Controller informing me that they owed me some money. While on hold I had to listen to a bunch of their propaganda crap. When I heard “Have you ever been at a movie and need to make a phone call, don’t bother others, just discreetly text your message”. O.K., I’m not a violent person but if I pay $12.50 to see a film and someone next to me whips out their phone and starts texting – they are getting an elbow right to the side of their head. If you really need to talk to someone, get your butt out to the lobby and do it there. End of story…

Volume Control

What the hell is the deal when watching certain channels that show commercials, the commercial volume goes up 100%! We can send men and women into space, access the internet on our cell phones and even create nuclear bombs that can incinerate the entire planet but we can’t regulate volume control? Give me a frakking break (yes, “frakking” homage to all the BSG fans out there). And yes, this is one of my pissy posts.

Tuesday, March 16, 2010

FYI - people who live in earthquake areas

That white sticky crap they sell to hold up posters works really well to hold things like vases and picture frames during an earthquake. You can find it at crafty places like Jo-Ann’s or Michaels. Live and learn people, live and learn and share what you learn.

English please

I have been lucky enough to have been able to travel to many different countries during my time on this planet. Never in my travels have I ever expected anyone in a country other than America, Australia, Canada or the U.K. to speak English. Note, some of the dialects in the U.K. took a while to understand, but I can say the same thing about Louisiana (p.s. F.U. Quebec) - . When I travel I usually take a translation dictionary in the case that my electronic devices don’t work. In the event that my attempt at their language doesn’t work (that happens often in Asia) I also carry a pad of paper and a pen so I can draw what I need. The later worked extremely well when I was trying to find a flashlight in a small town in Thailand. What pisses me off is I just drove to my local gas station to get some 7 UP because I had an upset stomach. It was after midnight so they had the door locked but you could order through the window and receive your purchase through a drop shoot. After asking for 7 UP I was shown “Corn Nuts” – NO! I said “it’s a drink” he responded with “No liquor”. I responded with “I want a soda beverage that is clear and sold in a green bottle”. I ended up with a bottle of Sprite because I was too frustrated to continue. Why is it that I have to carry a pad of paper and pencil or “press 1” to speak English when I live in America? Why do we do it when others don’t?